u know, i always thought that knowing that i was and would always be an artist was a relief. no worries about what i should or might do with my life. well. i was wrong, very wrong. theres no, "well u have a degree now..go get your job!" not that simple. its actually quite the opposite. what a gift to be creative, what a gift to be talented..but yes, what a pain that there is no guarantees. its hard to find your way and most of the time success is due to luck. yes i said it. even if i was the most talented artist out there i may not have the luck or connections to be seen or make a decent living. so yes artists have a certain burden of talent. but there is always that inborn yearning to produce, to give some of yourself and create something with meaning. and shit i cant seem to get rid of that so here i am, chasing the dream. and most of the time im completely doubting myself and my talent. and more than most of the time im discouraged and intimidated by the mere thought of being a successful artist. to support myself soley on my art?? are my hands even capable?? well yes its a pipedream but its my pipedream and today i see a glimmer.
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